Hello,

I want to tell you about my husband Michael; it’s nice to be able to talk about him, to share a bit of his life with you today.

My Mike was larger than life; he was generous to a fault and would give you his last. He worshiped his children and his grandchildren. He was my knight in shining armor.

Mike getting ill was a huge shock to us both. He was such a big, vital man – so full of life. They’d sent him one of those bowel cancer kits and I’d been nagging at him to do the test. He noticed some bleeding and mentioned he would go to the doctors, but a few days later I put my foot down and told him to make an appointment, right now.

They sent him straight to hospital for lots of tests. When they told him it was bowel cancer, it felt like the end of the world. But Mike wasn’t one to stand by – he wanted to do everything he could, even when it was difficult.

He was quite poorly having chemotherapy when our last grandchild Jacob was born. It was the first time I ever saw him upset; as he was only able to see little Jacob through the window that day.

I truly can’t remember when the Hospice came into our lives because it’s like they were always there. They were wonderful; we’d go in for coffee mornings or a game of bingo, or just chat with all the people we met. Mike got to know everyone so well, he offered lifts or brought people round for dinner. That’s just the kind of person he was.

Kelly, one of the Hospice nurses, would visit Michael at home, sort out his medications and chat through his worries. She became a friend to us both. I was doing my best to look after Michael, to put on a brave face but I was simply exhausted. Kelly said, ‘Why don’t you have a couple of nights respite from our Hospice at Home Team, someone to come in and help?’. It was so wonderful to have someone else there, time for me to get back my strength.

Mike spent so much time in and out of hospital that last year, but he was desperate to come home. We managed to get him back just in time for Christmas. He hadn’t been eating much but on Christmas day he managed some of the ham and mashed potatoes and gravy I’d made.

But after that, the Hospice nurses were coming in more often, making sure he wasn’t in pain. He was where he wanted to be, with me by his side. In the early hours of New Year’s Day, he didn’t wake up again.

I miss Mike desperately. But I want to impress upon you how important the Hospice is – I simply wouldn’t have been able to cope without them.

Today, I’m doing better; I’ve moved closer to my family and I’m going in for bereavement support. It’s just one more way the Hospice is helping me after losing the love of my life. Please support the Hospice this Christmas – and help them to look after families like mine who might need them.

Andy